About my P6 next year...
I am worried. I know that the P put high hopes on this batch and on me. And seriously, I am trying to figure a way of balancing creative learning and quality learning. It's P6, I want them to like Chinese instead of liking PSLE. I want to have good results, and seriously, I want it so badly. But I was flipping the Za Gen a few years back and saw the verse below. It is a great reminder!
你要专心仰赖耶和华；不可依靠自己的聪明。在你一切所行的事上都要认定他，他必指引你的路。- 箴 3:5,6
About friends...
Looking back, I am really thankful how I get to grow up with Glowing. It's such a strong identity mentally and visually, that even now people remember us as Glowing. They are the bunch of friends whom I knew since I was 13! Growing up also means pain, suffering and astray. Some of them go astray. It's a painful sight, I felt sad more than anger. But I have to learn, that THIS is life. Life is not perfect, not a bed of roses. They struggled about everything: love, work, temptations, money, even sexual preference.... Sometimes I wonder if the teaching back then, had any effects on them now. Or were they just memories. But I have to let go, and let God. Because, I can be the one going astray too. Ytd night, I was thinking, 如果我知道今天的我们会为这些而挣扎，当年的我会怎样和他们一起学习呢？
“为什么要为孩子创造回忆？因为有一天他们都会长大，都会离巢，然后个人冒着自己的风雨去摸索成长之路。他们一定有失意落寞的时候，那时我们不会在他们的身边，任何的道德教育都不会有太大的效用。但儿时的愉快经验会提醒他们：人间有情，不值得为一时的失败而放弃；那一片美好的经验会叫他们多撑一会儿，多走一步。” -杨牧谷牧师
About serving God...
Sometimes I wonder, if I was called into missions at all. I spent a few years exploring this option, and now I have decided NO. This is really not for me. It's not as easy as it seems. The stress level of a missionary is way higher than any jobs. But I figure out why I was attracted to mission work. Because I love to share the gospel, to bring people to God. And now I start to meet people from the market place. They are different, they puffs, they scold vulgarities, they love money. It dawned on me that it's very hard to bring them to church, because people in church looked down on such worldly-people. However, there's no difference between "puffs and vulgarities" and "lust, gluttony, greed, jealousy..."
God put different people in my every stage of life...
Designers, PRCs, children, mission field people and now people from market place....
I want, I really really want to bring these people to God... But "normal" churches are really too different for them.
The pain came to me when I was on the car, going home with the couple I went to Bintan. They are heavy smokers, filled with vulgarities. Yet, they are such nice people. On the way home, the girl suddenly turned around and asked me, "we are good people right?" Sigh! You see, they know that Christians think they are the baddies...
"有一个门徒，就是西门.彼得的弟弟安德烈，对耶稣说：这里有个小孩子，带着五个大麦饼、两条鱼..."- 约翰福音6:8
About weddings...
I am scared of weddings actually. Not because I hate people asking me "when is your turn". Ya I hate this. But I am more fearful to see couples breaking up. I get into a fearful mode when I see KayeeYX conversing intensely. I get fearful when I see other couples wanting to quarrel. And I can imagine myself curling up like a little one, don't know what to do and just want to break into tears. Oh well, nevertheless, I hope all my friends will have a quality marriage. =)
「然而, 靠著愛我們的主, 在這一切的事上已經得勝有餘了。」（羅8:37）
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